AHS HOTEL: ‘Room 33’ RECAP

I hate to admit this but I’ve been searching for points in the season that are going to disappoint me and eventually make me hate the season entirely. But the new season of American Horror Story: Hotel hasn’t done that just yet, and I’m starting to believe that I’m not going to be disappointed with this season. Like any other American Horror Story season, there’s a lot of stories floating around. The writers bring in a lot of characters, and then slowly disperse them or connect them to each other. We’re now in episode six of the Hotel season and things are starting to come full circle nicely. BTW, this recap will have spoilers. BTW, Will Drake has a nice butt.

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Lady Gaga: I think everyone had their uncertainties about Lady G filling the shoes of Jessica Lange, but she’s done an amazing job with her character this season. [Confirmed Gaga will return for the next season of AHS- whatever that may be] As the season progresses, I’m more enamored by her character and her motivations. I had a discussion with a friend a few weeks back and we were talking about Gaga being the villain of this season, and whether or not she’s supposed to be. Is she a villain? Should we assume she is mostly evil and a little nice? Or is she just a really complex character that has a good heart. Well, if you watched this week’s episode you probably know the answer to that. And it’s ironic that I was asking that question because I knew right from the start of this week’s episode, Tristan and Liz Taylor weren’t going to make it out alive.

As much as we’ve seen her give life to some characters, and in most cases she literally gave life to them or brought them back to life, she has a sense of ownership over them and she expects them to be loyal to her. She exudes this nurturing motherly figure, but really their happiness isn’t her concern, and her killing Tristan just shows that it’s all about her.

But an important flashback from this episode, 1924 Gaga shows up at the Murder House (season 1) to visit the doctor that everyone’s been raving about – the abortion doctor! Except Gaga isn’t having a baby, she’s having a demon baby. And when the doc pulls it out, it’s still alive and attacks the nurse. The better world would be slaughtered. But I guess since then Gaga has kept this demon baby  – Bartholomew hidden in Room 33, and for good reason that ish is fugly.

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Bartholomew: Super exciting that the entire time Gaga is kidnapping children around Southern California, she has a real baby of her own locked up in room 33. I mean it’s not a real baby, the face is pretty much torn off, and it has little beady eyes like a shark, but I mean it still came out of her V so it’s hers. We know about the baby because of the flashback, and then we see Gaga saying goodbye to it before she goes to Paris, and then Buffy the Vampire Slayer shows up at the hotel and wants to see little Bart. When Angela Bassett’s character enters room 33, she’s attacked by the demon baby. Also by this point we haven’t seen the demon baby yet. But anyways, John (Wes Bentley) is leaving the hotel after a bloody threesome, and before he zips up his suitcase demon baby hops into it! And then when John gets home demon baby escapes and lurks around the house. Scarlett is downstairs eating popcorn when dad sees the demon baby and shoots at it. Demon baby scurries off leaving a trail of blood. Scarlett gets sent back to her grandmothers, wow Chloe Sevigny is a ruthless mother she didn’t even want to look at her daughter now that she has Holden. Still outside, Chloe sees the demon baby and picks it up and brings it back to the hotel. When Lady Gaga returns she looks all worried and Chloe’s all like don’t worry I saved your baby just like you saved mine. And in the moonlit room Gaga doesn’t look so evil holding her demon baby.

Matt Bomer: Seems pretty useless right now, but he feels the need to preach to the two Swedish girls that died earlier in the season. “Find your purpose” he tells them, and I really hope he’s not quoting Justin Bieber. Ugh.

Liz Taylor: Is in love with Tristan and Tristan is in love with Liz Taylor! Who would’ve thought these two would fall for each other?

Tristan ‘When I come down to the lobby it’s like you’re genuinely happy to see me, I believe you’ Liz Taylor ‘You’re not gay for being with me, I’m a girl. Thank you for seeing the girl’

How cute are they though!? But you know sh**s about to go down because Tristan is Gaga’s boy toy and ain’t nobody going to steal her toys. Liz Taylor knows they’re screwed but he can’t help himself. PS, how much are you loving these 80s beats in the background? Gaga is too busy with Will Drake, until she’s not busy because uh…Will Drake is not a fan of the ladies. One quick text from the Countess ‘Cum up’ to Tristan and he knows he has to go.

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A. I love that Tristan calls her the Countess in his phone book B. His battery is charged fully even late into the night and C. Her spelling.

Long story short, when Tristan and Liz Taylor tell Gaga, she says okay you can have each other. And then she kills Tristan!!! Not shocking but totally ruthless!

AHS Hotel: “Mommy” RECAP

Last night’s episode of American Horror Story: Hotel was jam packed, and if you haven’t seen it yet, read our live recap below. We tried to avoid spoilers, but we got too excited at some parts. Here is our recap with The Sassy Gay:

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@Hollywd_Heroine

Who is he talking to? Ohhhh Evan Peters. Do u think Evan Peters was the drill ass man?

@thesassygay

Oh yea most likely. Tristan is not a good time right now. Thank god for black and white FOR REALS

@Hollywd_Heroine

Friggin’ Naomi Campbell…she’s a bad actress

@thesassygay

Ahhh he’s a ghost man

@Hollywd_Heroine

Yeah yeah

@thesassygay

You were right, he can’t leave. But Tristan can see him why?

@Hollywd_Heroine

He called him, like if he’s in the room and you call him he’ll show up

@thesassygay

Like Edward Mordrake. Okay, I’m really interested to see how this woman [Chloe Sevigny] becomes relevant – maybe to help all the kids in the hotel?

@Hollywd_Heroine

Yeah same she definitely is going to play a big part, she has a voice over? That’s interesting

@thesassygay

Yeah even the detective doesn’t have one

@Hollywd_Heroine

Soulmate? She’s talking about her son. Ryan Murphy has mommy issues for real

@thesassygay

Yeah, she’s happy to be a mother. LOL or very intrigued by the idea of having kids, being a maternal figure. Poor girl Scarlett is telling the truth, we need to listen to kids more

@Hollywd_Heroine

She should’ve told them a more believable story, coffins in an empty pool? Come on girl

@thesassygay

UGH can’t wait for Campbell to peace out – she is AWFUL!

@Hollywd_Heroine

LOL seriously, the irony is really boring ‘ugh models’ like we get it, you’re a model in real life okay

@thesassygay

Lmao in this she’s an “art curator” okay please don’t stretch the truth…and whooop there it is!

@Hollywd_Heroine

Wait so that guy [Max Greenfield] just lives in the mattress?

@thesassygay

Something about that scene made me giggle

@Hollywd_Heroine

Has she [Naomi Campbell] not slept in a bad yet? She’s been there for like two weeks now

@thesassygay

I know she’s dead and bloody but wtf just happened??

@Hollywd_Heroine

Jess B. heard everything!

@thesassygay

OMG EWWW. So Evan Peters can’t leave the hotel so he can’t be doing these murders. He must have a proxy

@Hollywd_Heroine

No it’s definitely not Evan Peters, there’s more layers to this story. WTF is happening to Max Greenberg how convenient…so he can’t talk now

@thesassygay

Of course he peaces out, like was that necessary?

@Hollywd_Heroine

Lol yeah right when he’s about to expose the Hotel I can’t even look at Paulson after that teeth scene

@thesassygay

Sarah Paulson is my favveeee!

@Hollywd_Heroine

Wes Bentley with handcuffs…ALL DAY everyday!

@thesassygay

Honestly Matt Bomer sounds like a baby

@Hollywd_Heroine

I hate that, such a weak excuse blaming his mother

@thesassygay

Daddy issues

@Hollywd_Heroine

Is that Matt? Where is he? Skid Row?

@thesassygay

Ew, that’s gross Matt Bomer, uh oh he’s about to get, ANGELAAAAAA!!!

@Hollywd_Heroine

HAAAAAAY!!

@thesassygay

YAAS QUEEN YAAAAAS!

@Hollywd_Heroine

Angela is baaaaaaaaaaack!

@thesassygay

LMAO she’s like  I don’t want you to be at home

@Hollywd_Heroine

LOL she’s like ya you need to go. I feel like he’s [Wes Bentley] going to become a killer

@thesassygay

For sure

@Hollywd_Heroine

He’s on the edge of glory [wink]

@thesassygay

Oooh, chateau margot, he is too gay to function LMAO and they just called him out on it. hahahaha

@Hollywd_Heroine

He’s so dreamy

@thesassygay

I like Gaga, I think she’s doing a good job

@Hollywd_Heroine

She’s turning gay men into straight. Woah

@thesassygay

Lol if anyone can do it, it would be GAGA

@Hollywd_Heroine

Bernie Madoff?!? lol

@thesassygay

He’s in this storyline!?!

@Hollywd_Heroine

Oh she’s going to marry/kill (maybe f***) dreamy gay rich guy

@thesassygay

Right right I figured that’s her game. OMG Wes Bentley is pulling a Lamar Odom ‘I’m so sick please stay, please stay’

@Hollywd_Heroine

OMG STOP. It’s too soon LOL. But still so good

@thesassygay

She’ll see Holdon now

@Hollywd_Heroine

Woah he remembers her? OMG no Kathy Bates!

@thesassygay

Poor Kathy!

@Hollywd_Heroine

“I want nothing more than the dark silence of death itself” Great line.

@thesassygay

OMG Angela really is Beyonce

@Hollywd_Heroine

OMG is she a vampire to? LMAO She Buffy?

@thesassygay

He has the power of eternal life. OMG I LOVE THIS SHE IS MY HEROO

@Hollywd_Heroine

LOL she’s amazing

@thesassygay

lezbihonest

@Hollywd_Heroine

OMG GAGA IS INSANE. That’s the cutest thing…them over the years!

@thesassygay

Elevator evolution

@Hollywd_Heroine

Ok I’m in love, who is this DMX wannabe?

@thesassygay

Let’s see those eyes up close and personal

@Hollywd_Heroine

He’s DMX but hotter, oh f***

@thesassygay

Omg noooo, the hottie rapper

@Hollywd_Heroine

Woah!

@thesassygay

She’s all about revenge, this is COVEN all over again! Come on

@Hollywd_Heroine

But it’s working, this is the game

@thesassygay

I really like Liz Taylor, she slays. Kathy Bates is passed out on drugs?

@Hollywd_Heroine

This sh** is happening too quickly, where was his epiphany all along?

@thesassygay

I’m glad she said it, because I’m like that is some type of irony

@Hollywd_Heroine

So she’s going to live forever now?

@thesassygay

Yeah, it was a good episode. Thankfully it wasn’t as gruesome or raunchy. I was excited to see Angela Bassett come THRU.But for reals, I think it’s a little dumb that she’s like “imma get back at her ‘cuz she got back at me” it truly is Coven all over again “someone working on the inside, I’mma kill her babies” i feel like she says the exact same line in Coven about the girls on Halloween night. There are so many stories moving at the same time, I don’t even know what the main through line is anymore, it’s like little pockets in each room –but it definitely works for this season

@Hollywd_Heroine

Agreed. I felt like that storyline in Coven worked though, so I’m excited, and realistically those children need to be saved so I’m glad there’s someone actually doing something about it. Or not, she might kill them so we’ll see

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AHS: HOTEL RECAP!

The Hollywood Heroine teamed up with fellow blogger The Sassy Gay to cover off the first episode of American Horor Story:Hotel. Here’s what we came up with.

ahs hotel,lady gaga,ryan murphy

@Hollywd_Heroine:

Okay so the premiere of American Horror Story Hotel premiered last night with a 90 minute episode, Sass what did you think of it?? Was Gaga all you wanted and more??

@thesassygay

Lol, well HH I know Gaga is central but I don’t think it’s all about Gaga

@Hollywd_Heroine:

No it definitely isn’t, and we saw a whole slew of new characters that are all so cray cray in their own way. Sarah Paulson plays a dead prostitute junkie – Kathy Bates plays the hotel’s front desk clerk AND Matt Bomer’s mom. Matt Bomer plays Lady Gaga’s man, Lady Gaga plays Queen B bloodsucker and Wes Bentley plays the handsome L.A.P.D cop that might unravel this entire thing. So let’s start right off the top, what did you think of the Hotel Cortez??

@thesassygay

I enjoyed it so far. I think that its a definite contender to be one of the better seasons AHS has produced. (Let’s be real FreakShow is defintiely at the bottom of that list) What did you think about the blood sucking aspect anyway?

@Hollywd_Heroine:

We were talking about this before and right off the top Hotel had such a different feel compared to Freak Show and Coven, this season is definitely darker and grimier and bloodier and just all around fu**ed up. Having said that, Hotel Cortez is going to be the perfect backdrop for all this madness. It seems like he’s blending in all these different concepts from different horror films – like the little kid similar to the one that’s in The Shining, and then you have Gaga whose basically a modern day Ryan Murphy version of a vampire, which is really cool right? Minus the sharp teeth, I’m really excited to see where that’s going to go.

@thesassygay

Yea, I’m not really sure if I’m 100% down for the blood sucking aspect to be honest, but it does drive the story – as we see in the first episode

@Hollywd_Heroine:

I mean whatever drives the story forward I’m down for, what did you think of her acting??

@thesassygay

K, I’m glad you asked because I’ve been thinking about it, it may be too soon to say it, but I think I’m gonna go there anyway. I kind of was hoping for a little bit more…crazy? Her character is very demure, well spoken, and just a tiny bit quirky from what we see I think I would have liked to see her go BIG and wild and free. She’s a blood sucking, life giving, slave owning, boss bitch. She can do whatever the f*** she wants

@Hollywd_Heroine:

Realistically, what did we expect? It’s pretty much her first ever acting gig, I don’t mind the character I feel like she’s going to turn up real quick in the season, and I’m also sort of happy that we have her instead of Jessica Lange, that momma matriarch thing was getting old real quick.

@thesassygay

I just think that she’s already set the tone for what side of her she intends to emote in her character and it isn’t quite what I had envisioned. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not asking for an over the top hokey character, just a little more quirk perhaps. I just think that she’s already set the tone for what side of her she intends to emote in her character and it isn’t quite what I had envisioned.

@Hollywd_Heroine:

Yep, let’s remember it isn’t our show no matter how much we would like to run this show. I really enjoyed Wes Bentley’s character, having a cop in the show with a little side drama is very L.A Noir and I’m wondering how they’re going to tie that all into the Hotel, because I feel like he’s crazy himself, like he has a mind of a serial killer right?

@thesassygay

He’s got that piercing look too

@Hollywd_Heroine:

Oh he definitely looks the part I’m already in love with him

@thesassygay

Lol, oh I know. I’m down for Matt Bomer – let’s be real Ryan Murphy gets to cast all the hotties whenever he wants and they’ll all say yes

@Hollywd_Heroine:

Ryan Murphy is gonna be like the Oprah of TV creators…I know you liked that jawline for daaaaaays. But seriously, who’s dead and who’s alive?? Because let’s remember that Kathy Bates pushed Sarah Paulson’s character out the window, and then Matt Bomer’s junkie ass killed himself, or Gaga killed him, so there are some dead people and there are some people that are very much still alive

@thesassygay

Yeah, I definitely think she’s some sort of immortal queen. Iris (Kathy Bates) seems alive, but she could’ve sold her soul for Gaga to save her son’s life. Lot’s of questions, not many answers yet. What are you’re most burning questions you’d want to discover by the end of the season?

@Hollywd_Heroine:

Ooooh I like that theory! I don’t know if I have any burning questions yet I’m just really excited for this show to get even more fu**ed up. Like where’s Angela Bassett’s character? Is Chloe Sevigny really going to play a boring housewife? And OMG what are they going to do for the Halloween episode? Okay, so I guess I do have a lot of questions…

@thesassygay

Definitely, I’m interested to learn a bit more about everybody from the first episode, forget the rest of the star studded cast we are yet to see. ALSO we do see a tie in already with another season of AHS!

@Hollywd_Heroine:

Yes right everyone keeps talking about these damn connections to previous seasons. And we see the real estate agent from season 1 “Murder House”, do you think anything major is going to happen with that connection?

@thesassygay

The Black Dahlia

@Hollywd_Heroine:

Who was that??

@thesassygay

Not only was it one of the most infamous unsolved murders in LA history, its gruesome story of a budding starlet being found completely cut in half. I’m sure they’ll make a connection with the murderer either staying there or the ghosts of past murders being housed in this haunted hotel. Just like in murder house

@Hollywd_Heroine:

Oh wow I don’t even remember. I’ve read that the connection might be Jessica Lange’s fourth child who we never meet in the murder house season…so there’s that to look forward to!

@thesassygay

Jessiccaaaaa!

@Hollywd_Heroine:

Anything else we can cover without giving too much away? I feel like people just need to watch the episode. It was super entertaining!

@thesassygay

Yea check that ish out. This + Scream Queens = turnt up Fall TV season

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Tune into FX on Wednesday nights for all new episodes of American Horror Story:Hotel

 

 

The Dirty on AHS: Freak Show

Just to update my fellow American Horror Story fans, more news on the upcoming fourth season titled Freak Show was revealed at this years Paley Fest.

The entire cast  was on the panel sans the queen herself, Jessica Lange. The cast opened up about their experience shooting in New Orleans, clearly everyone got their freak on as Sarah Paulson explained…they were drunk for most of the time!

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The shows co-creator Ryan Murphy went on to talk about the fourth installment. Freak Show will be another period season, taking place in Jupiter, Florida (but filming in New Orleans) in the 1950s. Freak Show will find Lange as a German ex-pat running one of the last standing freak shows in the U.S.

Murphy also confirmed everyone on the panel will be in upcoming season- yes that means more Bassett & Bates! There will also be first season actors making a return, as well as new addition Michael Chiklis who will be playing Lange’s ex-husband and Peters’ father.

All very interesting! Too bad it’ll be another 6 months!

 

American Horror Story: Coven ‘RECAP’

Last night’s episode of American Horror Story:Coven was the CRAZIEST episode by far this season! SPOILER ALERT!!! If you haven’t seen the episode, you need to go home right now and watch it because it was 60 minutes of brilliant television!

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Just when you think the episode is over- it’s not…and it unleashed a handful of new secrets. A lot of questions were answered last night so let’s get right into it.

The Axeman

The episode opens up to New Orleans in 1919, the city has a dangerous serial killer/jazz fanatic lurking the streets, he’s out to get women with his axe, especially women who aren’t fans of the jazz. The Axeman reports to the local newspaper that he’s going to kill anyone that isn’t playing jazz music- so of course these sassy witches at Miss Robichaux’s (the cven used to be jam packed with practicing witches) decide to defy the Axeman and play opera instead. When he walks by the  gated entranceway, he finds the gate a little open and decides to walk in. The house is quiet, he walks up to one of the bedrooms, where one of the witches (Meryl Streep’s daughter) is using her tarot cards. She unfolds the last card that has a picture of death, just when Axeman swings his axe, the witch dissapears and reappears behind him, she stabs him and then the rest of her sassy sisters emerge from the darkness and continue to stab the Axeman…killing him. Or so we think.

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Zoe’s Putting In Work

Zoe is determined to figure out what happened to Madison, and since the older women don’t seem to be protecting them- Zoe makes it clear to Nan and Queenie that they need to protect themselves. When Zoe’s searching through Madison’s things, one of the bottles goes flying into the closet and points to a secret hole in the wall. In there, Zoe finds an old spirit board. When she brings it to Nan and Queenie, they both refuse to play along because everyone knows nothing comes out of weejie boards. Zoe convinces them, reminding them they are one of the last witches and they need to protect each other. Even if that means finding out where their other witch sister has dissapeared to. The spirit board connects to a spirit in the house, he introduces himself as The Axeman. As if the name doesn’t scare them off, Zoe continues asking questions- like where is Madison? The spirit replies ‘attic’. Zoe goes up to the attic and finds Madison’s dead body in the room. After a brief struggle with Spalding (he can’t fight), Zoe brings up the other girls and they start asking him questions- like who killed Madison? Nan can read his mind, so it’s the only way to hear what he’s saying. He obviously covers up for Fiona and tells the girls that he killed her. Zoe doesn’t believe it, Spalding’s been around witches for a very long time, it wouldn’t surprise her that he’s learned some tricks along the way.

At Misty’s cottage, she’s enjoying her isolation with some more Stevie Nicks until Kyle (Frankenboy) shows up at the door. He’s all dirty so Misty decides to bathe him. During the bath Kyle has flashbacks of his mother abusing him and starts to freak out. He runs around her cottage naked- screaming (more like grunting), smashing things, he grabs Misty’s cassette player and destroys it. That’s it, Misty’s had enough- just then Zoe shows up. Misty is pissed off, which is surprising coming from her because she’s alwas in the weird hippy relaxed state. Anyways, Misty tells Zoe to get Kyle out of there…’He broke Stevie’. But Zoe has a plan, and it requires Misty!

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Back at the house, Zoe shows Misty the dead body of Madison. It absolutely stinks, she has a missing arm, and Misty tells Zoe she can’t do anything ‘there’s too much death inside her’ because she’s been dead for too long. Zoe tells Misty to try anyways, Misty tries for a few seconds but nothing happens. Misty asks Zoe to push on her stomach…they’re both using their energy- and then Madison starts coughing- first blood comes out, a few maggots…and then finally a ginormous cockroach. Madison’s first words were ‘I need a cigarette’.

Later, the colour in Madison’s face hasn’t even come back when they start asking her if she remembers who killed her. She remembers seeing red…and then nothing else.

Marie’s secret informant

So who knew that Marie Laveau had a secret informant in Delia’s crazy husband. Turns out he’s not really crazy- he’s just a sworn witch hunter. Whhaaaaaaaaat?! I’m still recovering from this twist, but of course it’s AHS- this stuff is bound to happen. So basically Marie hired Delia’s husband years ago to infiltrate the Salem witch coven and kill them all. He’s a legit witch hunter…and guess who the red head was? Yep she was a witch to. A quick flashback scene shows the red head girl sitting with Delia whose trying to convinve Red she needs to learn how to control her powers. Red has the power of settings things on fire, but she admits she doesn’t want any of it, she just wants to be a housewife with 3 kids. Marie is pissed off at what’s his face for taking so long to kill everyone. She accuses him of falling in love with Delia, he denies it, but maybe it’s true? Marie tells him he better go over there now and bring all their heads to her or she’s going to kill him. Oh and Marie wasn’t the one who burned Delia’s eyes. Marie tells him if she wanted Delia blind, she could’ve done it from her chair. Which is exactly what I was thinking. She’s so above that!

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Delia

Delia’s back from the hospital. Fiona and her husband are by her side, but when her man touches her again, Delia sees everything. She says, ‘it took me to go blind to see everything more clearly’- oh the irony. Delia tells him she can see everything, he tells her she’s probably just high from her medication. She tells him to leave the room. Fiona says she wanted to rip his arms out and kill him…but she refrained. Maybe she should’ve because he’s going to be back to kill them! Later, Delia escapes to her bedroom. As she’s getting into bed, the camera moves away from her and we see The Axeman sitting in her room. He tells her that the young witch promised him release- and if he doesn’t get it he’s going to kill her.

Zoe,Nan and Queenie hurry to find a spell to save Delia. Zoe (another reason why she’s supreme) scans the library of spell books without opening any of them. She instinctively knows which one’s going to help her and then proceeds to read the spell. Then,without a noise The Axeman is gone.

He walks out the front door with his briefcase in his hand, walks up to the gate…opens it and walks down the street. So he’s free now!

AHS COVEN: TONIGHT’S NEW EPISODE

Don’t forget there’s an all new episode of American Horror Story: Coven tonight!! Things are getting absolutely crazy- Delia’s blind but she can see things clearly now (literally things she couldn’t see before like her husband being a cheating murderer), Marie looks like she’s popped off and is seeking ultimate revenge against the white witches…and most importantly what will happen between Nan and her boy toy? (That last one was a joke but seriously- this episode is going to be cray)

All that and more. Watch.

 

P.S- Where is Evan Peter’s (Frankenstein) and is he going to return to Zoe?? Can’t forget about that.

AHS: COVEN “Burn, Witch Burn!”

Wednesday’s are my new fave day because of American Horror Story. Tonight there is an all new episode called ‘Burn, Witch Burn!’…we’ll find out what happened to Delia in the bar bathroom, maybe more about her psychotic husband, it looked like he was really pissed off at whoever burned her face.

American Horror Story: Coven airs Wednesday nights on FX / FX Canada at 10pm/EST.

American Horror Story: ‘Fearful Pranks Ensue’ RECAP

Last night’s episode of American Horror Story was a mix of Mean Girl antics infused with a little ‘dead’ from The Walking Dead. Just watch the episode if you don’t believe me! In the spirit of Halloween…the episode had a Halloween-ish theme, whatever that means. The show is legit based on Halloween stories- every week is Halloween in American Horror Story.

In the wake of Madison’s (Emma Roberts) death, Fiona demands for her servant Spalding to clean up the dead body. He rolls the body in the rug and whisks her away.

Dead

 

Meanwhile, Queenie is badly hurt, Delia and Fiona take her to the upstairs room to heal her. Kathy Bates is actually sad because she knows Queenie was just trying to save her. Queenie’s heart stops, Fiona sits over her and breathes into her mouth as if she’s breathing life into her. And that’s exactly what happens, Queenie wakes up gasping for air, she’s bloody bruised- but she’ll survive.

Right away Fiona knows who was behind the bull head man attacking Queenie. It’s an eye for an eye, seriously don’t f*** with bitch witches because they will out bitch you.

Across town, Marie is busy doing someone’s hair. There’s a delivery at the door, it’s actually a pretty big delivery. One of Marie’s workers opens it up and screams, Marie rushes over to the box and we see the head of the bull- chopped off its body…screaming! Ugh it was so freaky!

BULLHEAD

The games have begun.

Nan is freaking out because she can’t hear Madison in her head anymore. She’s got that mind reading witch power and the fact that she can’t hear Madison is worrying her. I love you Nan.

Nan alerts the council that something might be wrong with Madison…and obviously the head council lady (Frances Conroy) has her eyes set on Fiona. They know that Madison was the potential supreme, they know that Fiona was behind the murder of the last supreme…so they’re pretty much out to get her. The weird thing is, Delia shoots down the rumours that Madison was a supreme. In fact, Madison had a heart murmur she never told anyone. Does a heart murmur not make you eligible for the title of supreme witch? Also Delia notices that her living room rug is missing.

Either way, Delia knows more than she leads us to believe…but she doesn’t really know much about her husband. I knew this guy was shady from the beginning!! On a ‘business trip’, Delia’s husband invites an old flame back to his apartment. They hook up, and after the girl admits that she’s falling for him…he shoots her in the head. WTF!?!

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Frankenstein and Zoe are still at the house. He’s all bloody, she wants to make him a tuna sandwich, but when she returns Frankenstein is gone!!

Nan gets a visit from her smoking hot neighbour. Love story in the making? I swear if any harm comes to Nan, I will be done with this show!

Marie is back to her weird snake ritual witch spell thing, we see a cemetery, and then we see a bunch of dead zombies rising from the ground. She’s bringing back the dead!!

Later, Fiona and Delia have a night out- mother and daughter style. They shoot back a few drinks, Delia asks for her mother’s honest opinion on her husband. Fiona admits that she never liked him, she never believed who he was, he’s a fake…and she’s always wondered why Delia has never seen who he really is. I can’t wait to find out what’s really wrong with Delia’s man.

Delia goes to the ladies room to break the seal. While she’s washing her hands, a person dressed in all black approaches her from behind, Delia turns around, and the person splashes a clear liquid on Delia’s face. Delia screams as the liquid burns her skin. Who the hell was that? Is that Marie’s way of getting back at Fiona?

Finally, back at the mansion. Spalding is in his room- playing dress up. Yes, Spalding likes to dress up as a doll, in fact, he’s got an entire room full of little plastic dolls. But there’s one that really stands out, as the camera pans across the room, we see Madison’s dead body, all dressed up, she doesn’t even look dead. Spalding approaches her holding what looks to be a really old looking dress as if he’s going to put her in it! What a weirdo!! (Side Note: In the flashbacks, we learn that Spalding admits his love for Fiona, and then cuts out his own tongue in front of her!)

And then, as if things weren’t bad enough. The doorbell starts ringing for the long awaited Halloween trick-or-treaters. Kathy Bates is all ready with her bowl of candy. She opens the door and hands some candy to some children. She closes the door, and when she opens it a few seconds later, there are three very real looking zombies who are starring right at her. Her face turns white, she drops the bowl of candy, and then closes the door. Then the camera takes us outside and we see hundreds of zombies walking right up to the front door of the mansion.

Honestly, what the hell is going on!! I just want to see Nan find her true love.

Thoughts people?

Join the discussion on Twitter and Happy Halloween!

 

 

American Horror Story: ‘The Replacements’ RECAP

Okay, we need to talk about this. WTF went down last night on American Horror Story? Is this episode called ‘The Replacements’ because everyone is being replaced? Oh- guess I should mention…SPOILER ALERTS!

The Fam

It’s 1971, and Fiona is a young, beautiful witch. She’s having a conversation with an older woman who we find out is the supreme witch of her generation. Fiona doesn’t partake in activities with the other witches, her focus is being a supreme and proving to the elderly she has what it takes. But the old woman laughs Fiona off, reminding her what she had to go through to become a supreme.

Then Fiona fights back, the old woman is dying she says, she has diabetes and heart problems, she’s not fit to be a supreme anymore. Then Fiona cuts the old woman’s throat and kills her on the living room floor of Miss Robichaux’s. The camera zooms out and we can see Spalding (the butler) watching over her.

Jump back to the present, Fiona’s sitting at a bar looking stunning as always. Her voice drifts in with a beautiful monologue voice over I wish I could remember. Then we see a handsome guy, he looks over in her direction, then starts walking towards her. She talks about being young and being sexy, how every man wanted her, “My partners have been princes and starving artists, Greek gods and clowns.” All the men she had, thought they were leading her, but to Fiona they were just ‘primitive, beautiful animals’, so she led them by the collar. And then the camera zooms out and the handsome man has arrived at his target point, a group of young girls, while Fiona is in the background by the bar, watching them. It was such an amazing scene, everything she is, everything she is about is literally summed up in that 20 second monologue. I love this show.

SUPREME

After Delia finds out she for sure can’t have any kids, her only option is to visit Marie (Angela Bassett). Marie tells her she can do the fertility spell, then the episode cuts into a video montage of Marie acting out the spell in a weird ‘dancing circle with semen on a fire act’. It cuts back to her salon and Delia is worried but excited. Then Marie tells her it will cost 50k…Delia swears she will somehow come up with the money. Then Marie tells her…she won’t do the spell. Ever. Marie tells Delia she will never do anything for her because Delia’s mother is her sworn enemy. Delia sits there with tears in her eyes.

After Zoe meets Kyle’s mother she decides she’s going to bring Kyle back to her. The mother admits she was ready to hang herself when she got the phone call from Zoe. Meanwhile, Misty and Kyle are back inside the cabin. Misty is blasting Stevie Nicks, who apparently made all these songs about witches and spirits and is Ryan Murphy’s close friend, so now they’re using her music. Zoe arrives to pick up her boyfriend, Misty shows off Kyle’s scars- or lack there of. He’s almost fully healed, well his body, he’s still a mute motionless man. Zoe picks him up and promises she’ll return for Misty. Only Misty doesn’t believe her.

Back to Miss Robichaux’s house, there’s a new neighbour in town and he is smokin’ hot! The girls are spying on him while he’s shirtless, until his mother walks up and sees them watching. She yells at him to come back in the house and put a shirt on. It sparked an interesting conversation between the girls. Nan confidently admits she’s not a virgin, Queenie on the other hand proclaimed she was saving herself for someone special. And Madison…we already know the answer to that. Later, Nan decides to bake a cake for the hottie and take it over. Her and Madison show up at the house, the mother is apalled by Madison’s wardrobe, Nan is too cute, she totally reads hot guy’s mind. (I think I want that superpower) He loves the cake and hates the attention Madison is craving. Ohhhh yeahh, hot guys a good guy!

Witches

Hot guy’s mom is a crazy church lady, after Madison uses her witch powers to throw the knife to the wall, the mother demands the they leave her house immediately. On the way out, Madison lights the curtains on fire, Nan looks at her, “I didn’t know you could do that” Madison replies, “Me either”. Does this mean Madison could be the next supreme? She can throw things and light things on fire…she has two powers…this isn’t looking good for Fiona.

Kathy Bates was by far the funniest thing on last night’s episode. She’s starring at the TV…balling her eyes out as she watches President Obama deliver a speech. She’s not crying because she’s proud, she’s crying because a black man is being named President. She doesn’t believe it until Fiona walks in and tells her what she’s missed over the last century.

Zoe returns Kyle back to his mother. She leaves them alone. Kyle’s mother is crazy, after seeing him in the shower she asks him where his body came from. He looks bigger, he doesn’t look like the boy she knew. And boy did she ‘raise’ him…she starts touching Kyle in all the wrong places and we see a better picture of Kyle’s background. Later, when he can’t take it anymore, he whacks his mother to death with an old sports trophy. Zoe visits him a few hours later, she sees his mother’s dead body…and then sees him covered in blood.

Back at the house, Kathy Bates and Queenie are fixing dinner. Correction, Kathy Bates is now a house slave for Queenie….oh how the roles have been reversed. Queenie demands Kathy bake her a peach cobbler…while they’re busy yapping away at each other, they hear a grunt coming from outside. Kathy Bates knows right away who it is. It’s the half bull half man guy at her door!

Queenie yells at Kathy to go upstairs, she’ll take care of this. Queenie steps outisde, at first it looks like she’s got everything under control- and then she starts looking afraid. She calls the animal over, and lures him into the backyard area. Then out of nowhere, she starts touching herself!!! I guess she tries to turn the bull on? It looks like he’s feeling it, until the bull gets behind her…and then grabs her face. Cut Scene! Whaaaaaaaat?!?!!?

Finally, Fiona decides to spend some quality time with Madison. She finds out that Madison lit the curtains on fire and is immediately suspicious new girl might be the new supreme. They spend a night on the town getting hammered, except Madison is actually downing the shots and Fiona is just pretending to drink. [Side Note: Fiona visits her doctor earlier and finds out she has cancer, her immune system is shutting down, she’s dying.]

SupremeNExt

Then, the unthinkable happens. Fiona and Madison return home, they start talking and Fiona admits to Madison that she might be the next supreme. Madison laughs it off. Fiona grabs the knife (they’re standing in the same spot where Fiona killed the elderly supreme) she begs Madison to kill her. She’s already dying and wants to die. Madison calls her crazy she refuses to grab the knife, in the scuffle of screaming and pushing, Fiona slices Madison’s throat and the young girl falls to the floor. Spalding is standing in the doorway, in the same spot…watching Fiona. She walks over to him, he hands her a tissue to wipe the blood away from the knife. She takes seat and says, ‘We don’t need a new supreme, we need a new rug’.

The End.

WTF? So wait are all the young witches except for Nan about to die? Is Madison really dead? What are your thoughts?

American Horror Story: COVEN RECAP

Ahhhhhhhh! Last night was the season 3 premiere of FX’s American Horror Story: Coven. It’s been a long wait for this premiere, and it seemed like fans around the world were expressing their excitement as well on Twitter.

SPOILER ALERT!

Honestly the episode was mainly the set up of everything, introduction to the premise (which I love)…there weren’t any major spoilers since nothing has really happened yet.

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It’s starts off in 1834 New Orleans…slave trade is in high bloom…and Kathy Bates is an evil fat housewife. Her daughter is caught having sex with one of the black slaves so she writes it off as rape and begins to torture the slave….taking him up to the attic where all the other tortured slaves are chained. There’s some with no eyes, some with their mouths sewn shut…and you don’t want to imagine the rest but it is very American Horror Story-esque.

Then it jumps to present day with Taissa Farmiga’s character and she’s sneaking up to her bedroom to have sex with her boyfriend. A few minutes in he starts bleeding from his nose and then goes into full freakout mode with blood coming out of his ears and eyes. She basically kills her boyfriend, but the excuse they used was ‘brain aneurism’. What she really found out was that her great grandmother was a witch…and now she has the witch gene…so somehow her evil power is to kill men while she’s having sex with them. I mean she has other powers…but she hasn’t learned to use them yet. Which is the reason she gets sent to Mrs. Robichaux’s Academy for Exceptional Young Ladies in New Orleans. By this point, the foundation is being shaped and all the little pieces were coming together…I have to say I really love the premise of this new season.

So she arrives at this academy accompanied by Frances Conroy (using real names but she’s the angel lady from last season)…now she’s basically the school’s head hunter…and a little cray cray. Aren’t they all? Then we see the rest of the cast…there’s three other young girl witches- Emma Roberts, Gabourey Sidibey and Jamie Brewer. None of them are very experienced with their powers, but Sarah Paulson’s character has brought them all in to teach them how to survive in a world that still torments women that are considered to be witches.

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And then we’re introduced to Ms. Jessica Lange, who we find out is the supreme witch….and is also Sarah Paulson’s mother. After a failed attempt to find a drug that makes her youthful…she decides to leave LA and visit her daughter in New Orleans. For the most part it seems like these two are good people, but they obviously have a troubled relationship. Jessica Lange is dissapointed with Sarah’s character because she wastes her time creating potions and poisons…and as a mother she just wants to see her daughter flourish into a supreme witch like herself.

Emma Roberts’ character is the rebellious one, she’s somewhat of a D-list celebrity and forces Taissa’s character to attend some frat party. It all goes wrong when Emma Roberts is gang raped by some frat douches…Taissa’s busy talking to Evan Peter’s character and realizes Emma’s been missing for a while. They find her in a bedroom…Evan breaks it up and tries fighting his frat brothers. The other guys run outside to their party bus, Evan continues to yell at them until one of the guys punch him out. The bus screeches away, Taissa chases after them and you’re hoping she does something but then Emma runs out to the street and after a few silent seconds the party bus flips into the air and comes crashing down into the flames. Talk about revenge!

The next morning the girls are having breakfast at the home, the bus crash is on the news and Taissa’s praying that her man she just met is still alive. Jessica Lange walks into the kitchen and automatically knows the girls were behind this. Then she tells the 4 girls they’re going on a field trip and is going to teach them something useful. Emma is quick to rebel but bitch don’t you know by now you don’t talk back to Lange. Emma’s literally thrown across the room and hits the wall hard for talking back. Gabourey and Jamie have a short giggle and I’m already loving this dynamic of high school drama meets Sabrina the teenage witch.

On their field trip they visit the former home of Kathy Bates. They see the attic where all the slaves were kept…and then Jamie veers off the tour and finds herself
Outside starring at the covered pavement. Jessica approaches her and asks her what she hears…Jamie replies, ‘the lady of the house’ I love how each girl has her own ability…and were slowly unravelling the journey they’re about to take.

Taissa visits the hospital to see who the two remaining survivors were from the crash. She hopes it’s Evans’ character but it’s not it’s the douchebag. So she starts to have sex with him until his head bursts with blood and he dies. Weird right?

So we find out a big black witch (Angela Bassett) visits Kathy Bates, she gives her a poison to ‘help her husband stay faithful’ but instead the poison ‘kills’ her. The only thing was they never found Kathy’s body.
Later Jessica visits the house again, this time with a construction crew and they dig up Kathy Bates who is legit in the same dress she drank the poison in, and she is fully alive.

So now that Kathy’s still alive does this mean Angela’s alive to?? This season has some amazing characters I can’t wait to see what unfolds. What is Jessica Lange up to! Because we know she didn’t leave Hollyweird for no reason.

I guess this means Evan Peters’ character is dead? Which sucks because he’s always a big role in these seasons. Also the girl who played the nun/devil last season is also a witch ,but the people in her town find out she’s weird so they literally burn her alive. Another reason why Jessica returns to New Orleans, she wants to find all these girls with special abilities and teach them how to practice safe witching.

Loved it loved it! Do Ryan and Brad ever disappoint us? Can’t wait for next week!